Velvet Elvis: The High Life >>

• BEST ELVIS IMPERSONATOR (1 Comment)
  Duke Hicks
  Lord almighty, we feel our temperature rising, especially when Mesa resident and diehard Elvis Presley fan Duke Hicks takes to the stage and unleashes his realistic reproduction of the legendary superstar. Having offered up his Elvis imitation act for more than two decades, this delivery man and... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO ACT LIKE YOU GOT BIG CHIPS
  The J Bar at the James Hotel
  Even if you ain't got big chips, there are places -- especially in Scottsdale -- where it will behoove you to act as if you do, and the J Bar is one of them. This super-slinky waterin' hole packs in the booful people on peak nights Thursdays through Saturdays, and the high-class chicas therein... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO LOSE YOUR SHIRT
  Shepherd's Super Soak-Her
  Everyone worships the good Lord in his or her own way. On Fridays, Muslims hit the mosque, and on Saturdays, Jews go a-synagoguing. Christians of many denominations make Sunday their day of prayer, and we fall into this category, although our chapel, if you will, is Shepherd's Nite Club, where... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO DOUBLE DOWN
  Castle Megastore on a Tuesday or Thursday night
  For those of you who don't play blackjack often and who've never seen the buddy flick Swingers, wherein this gambling maneuver is much discussed, doubling down is essentially doubling your bet in mid-play because the odds are in your favor. And what's the best time and place to double down in... More >>
• BEST WHALE WATCHING
  Arizona Biltmore Resort & Spa
  In casino terms, a whale is a big fish with money to burn: a Shamu-size gambler who can afford the fickle fortunes of wagering, while staying in a posh money pit and enjoying all the amenities due someone of his or her stature. If we think of PHX as a Vegas-style casino, then the best "whale"... More >>
• BEST SAWDUST JOINT
  Bikini Lounge
  In the parlance of gaming, a sawdust joint is a no-frills, lower-end gambling parlor, the kind of place where they might even have sawdust on the floor, but where you can still catch that betting buzz. Now, there's no sawdust on the floor of the Bikini Lounge, and there's not even gambling,... More >>
• BEST CARPET JOINT (1 Comment)
  Pussycat Lounge
  Picture the polar opposite of the sawdust joint, and that's a carpet joint, the sort of plush, swank spot that caters to the moneyed and dissolute, the terminally hot, who want nothing more than to rub up on one another while sipping their cosmos. The Pussycat Lounge is the best carpet joint in... More >>
• BEST DINNER AND A SHOW
  Bacchanal Greek Restaurant
  Introverts, you've been warned. If you're the wallflower type, stay the hell away from Bacchanal. In addition to gourmet Grecian cuisine -- like succulent lamb capama and mouth-watering moussaka -- this east Phoenix ethnic eatery is famous for its big, fat Greek wedding of food and festivities.... More >>
• BEST NEW NIGHTCLUB
  e4
  You might be pimpin' all over the world, like Ludacris, or you might be pimpin' in Old Town as a $30,000-per-annum "millionaire" with a Lexus on lease and a wardrobe by MasterCard. Either way, if you're young, hot and stylish, chances are the glamorous new Scottsdale club e4 is calling your... More >>
• BEST MANSION
  Wrigley Mansion
  There's a lot to love about the Wrigley Mansion, built by chewing-gum magnate William Wrigley Jr. for his wife, Ada, and now owned by Phoenix's own jazz-playing recluse Geordie "Son of Spam" Hormel, heir to the meatpacking fortune. The interior of the regal mansion is a little dusty and... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO DRINK IN THE RAIN
  AZ 88
  When the weather's just right, we like to sip a vodka martini on the perfectly appointed patio at AZ 88, with the rest of the beautiful people. When it's too hot, we'll crowd up against them at the bar. Last time we were there, it drizzled, but instead of ushering the B.P.s indoors, the staff... More >>
• BEST PLACE FOR A TWILIGHT DRINK
  jade bar
  Every year, the sunsets in the Valley just seem to get better and better. We'd tell you that's because of the increase in pollution, which, at twilight, lights the sky on fire with pinks and oranges. But that would be a buzz kill. Better to simply send you over to the jade bar -- the bar... More >>
• BEST PLACE FOR A FIRST DATE
  Segway tour at Westin Kierland Resort
  For a first date sure to set you apart from every other yahoo who attempted to impress your paramour before you, hook up with the concierge at the ritzy Westin Kierland Resort in north Scottsdale for a semi-guided ride on the hotel's fleet of $5,000 Segway scooters. Merely stepping on the... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO EAT AT THE BAR
  Roaring Fork
  What's that sexy look in Roaring Fork proprietor/chef Robert McGrath's eye? Yeah, baby, Chef Robert knows what you want and just how you like it: His signature 12 oz. Big Ass Burger with roasted green chiles, long horn cheese, bacon, grilled onion, and fries, served only at the restaurant's... More >>
• BEST WAY TO EAT AND DRINK LIKE GODZILLA
  Tokyo Tuesdays at Ra Sushi Bar
  Hey, you! Yeah, we're talking to you. You got a Godzilla-size appetite? Then get your fill of Japanese food and stiff cocktails during Tokyo Tuesdays at Ra Sushi Bar. From 8 p.m. to midnight, Ra serves up monster-themed drinks and menu offerings while screening classic Godzilla and martial arts... More >>
• BEST HAPPY HOUR
  Susie's Mexican Cafe
  We've had a long, hard day of keeping our noses to the grindstone, but now it's quitting time and we're plenty parched. We need a place to quench our thirst and drown our sorrows, cheap. While nearly every local bar, tavern and saloon offers the ubiquitous happy hour, few are as inexpensive as... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO GET DRUNK ON A DIME
  Blaze Nightclub
  Find a penny, buy a drink: Every Friday and Saturday night, Blaze hosts "1 Cent Night," where lushes can enjoy penny U-Call-Its from 8 to 11 p.m. The special includes top-shelf liquors like Hennessy, Hypnotiq, and Kahlúa, so your dates will think you're spending lots of moola for them to... More >>
• BEST BYOB
  Giuseppe's Italian Kitchen
  We don't like whining about wine, but the vino prices at restaurants these days are through the roof! All we want is a little bottle of Chianti or a nice Pinot Noir to slurp with our meal, but the bottle that costs you $12 at Cost Plus might go for two or three times that much in the most modest... More >>
• BEST DRUNK FOOD
  Durant's debris
  With the ghosts of such renowned tipplers of yore like John Wayne and Jack Durant roaming the place, it's no wonder that this Phoenix classic serves what we regard as the best drunk food ever conceived on the face of the planet. Indeed, after our fifth or sixth Crown and Coke, what we want is a... More >>
• BEST LOCAL BEER
  Kiltlifter Scottish-Style Ale
  Life is short, pallie. Nothing's guaranteed in this crazy-ass world, except that eventual date with Doctor Death, and the fact that The Man owns your ass from diapers to dust. So what's the point? Is it all so bad people will burn in Hades and goody two-shoes and snitches will get to strap on... More >>
• BEST BREW PUB
  Rock Bottom at Desert Ridge Marketplace
  Imagine 40,000 gallons of beer on the wall. That's what the Rock Bottom brewery chain produces every year, using the finest hand-selected hops and malted barley from Yakima Valley in the Northwest. Rock Bottom's got three other Valley locations (see the Web site for locales in Glendale,... More >>
• BEST MARTINI
  Camus at the Clarendon Hotel
  We have no earthly idea what you're going to do once you finish reading all these Best Ofs. Change your underwear finally, we hope. But we do know what we're doing once we're finished writing all these puppies: heading over to the Clarendon's Camus restaurant and bar, where we plan to grab a... More >>
• BEST MOJITO
  Sierra Bonita Grill
  Here's how to mix a good mojito: Take a lime and put it into the microwave for about 20 seconds. This makes it easier to extract the juice from the bugger. Squeeze into a tall mortar (a bowl will do, if you are as ill-equipped as we are). Add a tablespoon of sugar, plus four or five washed mint... More >>
• BEST COSMO
  Portland's
  We know, we know, Sex and the City is so 2004. Everyone who's anyone is now watching Entourage. But can we help it if we developed a strong attachment to Carrie Bradshaw's favorite drink, the cosmopolitan? We know vodka sales skyrocketed along with Sex's ratings, and we intend to keep sales... More >>
• BEST SANGRIA
  Havana Cafe
  We never tire of visiting the various Havana Cafes owned and operated by B.J. and Gilbert Hernandez. This year, we recognize them for their sangria, that fruity, blood-red Spanish libation that elsewhere can seem so drab and bland, but at Havana Cafe is terribly refreshing and bursting with... More >>
• BEST MELONBALL
  Stray Cat Bar and Grill
  When your mixed drink of choice is the melonball, and it seems to be made differently (and usually poorly) at every bar in the Valley, you start to feel like maybe you should just order a friggin' screwdriver. Most of the time, when you do ask for a melonball, you get a drink made of mostly... More >>
• BEST NEIGHBORHOOD BAR, CENTRAL PHOENIX
  Shady's
  This newcomer has just the right features to keep us coming back. First of all, Shady's is no townie hangout. Its cool, understated coziness -- a compact bar, black upholstered banquettes and booths, a single pool table -- attracts a crowd that's young, good-looking, and interested in more than... More >>
• BEST NEIGHBORHOOD BAR, NORTH PHOENIX
  Joe's Grotto
  One might assume that Joe Grotto is a bit pompous, given that he named his north Valley speakeasy after himself. But after you encounter the friendly and down-to-earth owner (if you can manage to flag him down as he eagerly interacts with customers, that is), you'll discover how appearances can... More >>
• BEST NEIGHBORHOOD BAR, WEST VALLEY
  Amber Inn Cocktail Lounge
  Nowhere is the west side's rough-and-tumble reputation more apparent than at the adult playground of sorts available at this tavern. Barflies from miles around amble into the Amber Inn for grown-up thrills, whether it's the arcade claw machine stocked with triple-X DVDs and other porno... More >>
• BEST NEIGHBORHOOD BAR, SOUTH PHOENIX
  Federico's Bar and Pool Hall
  For many Valley urbanites, the portions of Phoenix located south of Interstate 17 might as well be south of the border. Ask 'em for the hookup on any hip hangouts or cool clubs among the blighted badlands of junkyards, dollar stores, or industrial parks, and you'll usually get blank stares or... More >>
• BEST NEIGHBORHOOD BAR, TEMPE
  Casey Moore's
  Approaching its 20th anniversary, Casey's is still the best place to hang if you're too cool for school -- namely, nearby Arizona State. Whether you're a hipster art student or a slacker fifth-year senior, chillin' at Casey's with a plate of crab cakes and a mug of Guinness (and blowing off that... More >>
• BEST NEIGHBORHOOD BAR, SCOTTSDALE
  Mardi Gras Bar and Grill
  Turns out that drunks and dickheads aren't the only things that've been 86'ed from this roadhouse, as boredom and pretentiousness are equally verboten. Despite this club's hot spot in the shadows of Scottsdale, there's nary a posturing person to see or be seen among a diverse throng of pierced... More >>
• BEST NEIGHBORHOOD BAR, SOUTHEAST VALLEY
  Pecos Lounge
  A thought struck us the other day as we sipped a rum and Coke while maxing and relaxing inside this, our newest favorite watering hole: This place is definitely chill. Maybe it's all the fans and vents blasting freezy freshness throughout this darkened shelter from the sun, or perhaps it's the... More >>
• BEST GAY BAR
  BS West
  BS West is absolutely one of the friendliest clubs you'll ever party at, whether you're bi, gay, straight, or none of the above. Hidden in Scottsdale's back streets (despite its Fifth Avenue address), the party's always pumpin', with enough stud muffins in attendance to make a het fella rethink... More >>
• BEST LESBIAN BAR
  Ain't Nobody's Bizness
  There was a time when people were afraid that "The Biz" would be a victim of its own success. The Valley's oldest lesbian bar is also its best-known, and if straight people know about only one gay bar in the city, it's The Biz. But what makes this bar so popular for people of any sexual... More >>
• BEST PLACE FOR GUYS TO WATCH GIRLS GRIND ON EACH OTHER
  Axis/Radius
  We swear, if we took our mom to Ain't Nobody's Bizness, then drove her across town to Axis/Radius, she'd think the Scottsdale club was the lesbian bar. Everybody knows that the gals in the stylish Scottsdale clubs are stone-cold hotties, with their low-cut shirts and skirts so tight they could... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO MEET A TRANNY
  Cruisin' Seventh
  Our desert metropolis has everything, including a place where one can pick up a lady with a little something extra, if you know what we mean. These unique gals congregate for libations and laughter at Cruisin' Seventh, a queer neighborhood dive that's become popular with transgender and... More >>
• BEST GAY LEATHER BAR
  Padlock
  Locating this nightspot can be difficult if you're not a leather queen or at least a fan of same, since the Padlock has no flashy sign, just a giant black and blue flag (which means "Trusses and biker caps in here, lads!") painted on the front wall. Inside, dungeon decor and dartboards are the... More >>
• BEST POOL HALL
  Groggy's
  A pool hall, as opposed to a billiards parlor, should be comfortable but with an edge. The kind of place where no one tells you to take your feet off the neighboring barstool; where the drinks are strong, a game costs 50 cents, the sticks are straight, and chalk is plentiful. You want a place... More >>
• BEST ENGLISH PUB
  George & Dragon English Restaurant and Pub
  It's hard to resist the charms of a bar that serves up both darts and bangers and mash, which is why George & Dragon is our pick as the best English pub in town. A low-key spot, it's bigger on comfort than style, catering to football hooligans and people who like a good pint -- real Brits, in... More >>
• BEST IRISH PUB
  Fibber Magees Irish Restaurant & Pub
  We've picked Chandler's Fibber Magees as the Best Irish Pub again for one salient reason: To be a great Irish pub, you not only have to have great drink, an authentic atmosphere, and Irish music, you also have to have a solid Irish menu, one that does more than give lip service to the cuisine of... More >>
• BEST HOOKAH BAR
  Red Sea Hookah Lounge
  If you regard pitas, shish kebabs and belly dancers as a distraction to your hookah pipe smoking, then the Red Sea Hookah Lounge is the place for you. The Red Sea isn't a restaurant; it's a straight smoking joint. Sprawl on the velvet love seats and order up a water pipe of tobacco in flavors... More >>
• BEST STRIP CLUB
  The Penthouse Club
  A veritable seraglio of heterosexual sin that could turn one of those altar-boy-caressin' Father Feelgoods in the Catholic Church into a red-meat-eatin' lover of the female form, this palatial chichi emporium boasts 160 of the finest dames in the Valley, each of them getting half-nekkid just for... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO SHOW YOUR BOOBS
  Coyote Hill Bar and Grill
  Tits, bazooms, chi-chis, ta-tas, melons, jugs. No matter what you call them, if you want to be the queen bee of Coyote Hill, you have to be willing to show them off a time or two. At this popular nightspot just three miles north of Glendale Arena, DJ Mikey Mike hosts "Bead Night" every Friday... More >>
• BEST DANCE FLOOR
  Barcelona
  A big, swank Spanish restaurant by evening, by night Barcelona becomes a meat market pulsing with dance tunes and beautiful people on the prowl. Most nights, count on a DJ who knows how to keep the place hopping or a band that does a decent job covering good dance tunes. But unlike lesser clubs,... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO FOX-TROT
  Johnny's Uptown
  All these new ballroom-dance-related reality shows and feature films have us craving a smooth spot to glide across a dance floor. The place that comes to mind is a jazz club tucked quaintly into a corner of Uptown Plaza at Central Avenue and Camelback Road. Johnny's Uptown caters to those with... More >>
• BEST SPORTS BAR
  BJ's Sports Bar and Grill
  If you need a place to sit back with a bottle of beer while watching a game, a place where you can sing your troubles away to an off-pitch karaoke song, or a place to rock along with local bands, BJ's is where you'll best land. And before you try to score points with a giggle at this hopping... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO GET MOONED
  Half Moon Sports Grill
  Don't expect any alone time in either of the restrooms at Half Moon, an upscale sports bar that caters to corporate lackeys looking to unwind -- and to undress, apparently. Each restroom has what appears to us to be a strategically located video camera mounted in a corner, pointed right at you.... More >>
• BEST FAKE VOLCANO
  Hurricane Bay
  Standing nine feet tall, weighing in at five hundred pounds, this enormous monstrosity can put any bar mascot to shame. Set at the entrance of Hurricane Bay in north Phoenix, a giant replica of a volcano inspired by Mount Wannahockaloogy from the Disney movie Finding Nemo transports patrons... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO BE SEEN
  The Gelato Spot
  Sure, you can see and be seen all night long in the clubs, but in some circles, gelato has become the new nightcap -- and everyone who's anyone is slurping it up. It's a true Experience, hanging at The Gelato Spot, which shares a strip mall with Zen 32, Delux, and Hava Java. On a recent visit... More >>
• BEST PLACE NOT TO BE SEEN
  Chez Nous
  If you're up to no good and don't want the whole town to know about it, there's no better place to hide out than this funky, thoroughly dark central Phoenix watering hole. The Valley's version of Hernando's Hideaway has a great retro vibe, a thoroughly diverse clientele, and just enough smoke... More >>
• BEST DIVE BAR
  Palo Verde Lounge
  There's no explanation for a place like the Palo Verde. Dude, this place should be on an episode of Ripley's Believe It or Not. By everyone's admission, even the regulars, the PV is a dive. Outside, the junky brick building looks like it might house a meth lab or a massage parlor. Inside, it's... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO WATCH BIKERS BREAK-DANCE
  Dirty Dogg Saloon
  Dirty Dogg Saloon may be a "biker bar," but don't be scared. The hot Harleys and other shiny chrome hogs out front belong mostly to middle-aged moneymakers and thirtysomething trendsetters. After all, we're talking about a bar in a Scottsdale strip mall. Some of the fellas still look pretty... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO DRINK WITH BIKERS WITHOUT GETTING YOUR ASS KICKED
  Hardtailz Bar and Grill
  Check your attitude at the door. Hardtailz caters to bikers, but it's no place for assholes. You don't have to have tattoos or grease under your fingernails to get a fresh drink as soon as yours runs dry. Unlike some other places where strange faces are greeted with suspicion or indifference,... More >>
• BEST BAR IN TEMPE THAT (SHHH!) ALLOWS SMOKING
  Yucca Tap Room
  Kudos to the Yucca Tap Room for a courageous common-sense approach to the anti-smoking Nazis. At considerable financial risk (establishments that allow smoking can be fined up to $500 by the city, and snitches can rat to the police online), the Yucca keeps a healthy supply of Altoids tins behind... More >>
• BEST DEADHEAD BAR
  The Sail Inn
  One of the last surviving old Tempe bars, the Sail Inn regularly hosts Grateful Dead cover bands like The Noodles and Xtra Ticket. Both bands kick out mind-reeling jams, much to the delight of Deadheads who come from miles around and are still kicking up the dirt 10 years after Jerry Garcia's... More >>
• BEST KARAOKE
  Apollo's Lounge
  When heading down Seventh Street, drivers can't miss the massive blue and yellow sign that screams "Apollo's!" and marks the spot where a personable bunch is always busy welcoming a good time. And for anyone, gay or straight, who can't resist belting out his fave tune in public, Apollo's -- one... More >>
• BEST SPIN
  Hot Pink!, Friday nights at Karamba
  Electroclash had already peaked by the time this Friday-night dance fest got started, but that didn't stop Phoenix's young and trendy from coming out en masse to freak dance to Fischerspooner. Wisely, though, founder DJ Nimh (who stays involved but has since moved to New York City) established a... More >>
• BEST DJ LEGEND
  Pete "SuperMix" Salaz
  Phoenix has some great DJs of all stripes, proficient in all types of musical genres, but is there anywhere in town a DJ of more renown than Pete "SuperMix" Salaz, the Buddha of House, who has long reigned over the night like some affable Aztec god? If you spotted Salaz on the street, you'd just... More >>
• BEST HOUSE DJ
  DJ Senbad, a.k.a. Sean Badger
  Wanna party with the PHX's Sultan of Soulful Beats? Then DJ Senbad, a.k.a. Sean Badger, is your man. Though Next's Wednesday night Batucada is no more, DJ Senbad continues his magical carpet ride, whether at special events, like pool parties at the Clarendon, or at the new house night over at... More >>
• BEST HIP-HOP DJ
  DJ Fashen
  Whether he's setting the decks ablaze at the after-party for the Soul Train Music Awards in L.A., or backing up Da Nutz weekday afternoons on Power 92.3 FM with the Two Hour Drive at Five, DJ Fashen is one of the greats in the game, who weaves the most popular hip-hop of the day in with classic... More >>
• BEST ROCK DJ
  William Fucking Reed
  DJ William Fucking Reed has but one command for your delicious derrière: Get on that floor and dance! Every Saturday night at the Rogue Bar East in Scottsdale, Reed hosts Shake!, a frenzied, hip-twisting bacchanal where he drops genres like mod, glam, post-punk, garage, Brit-punk, metal,... More >>
• BEST SAVE
  Tigerface
  The night that Tigerface crashed its own party might've been the kind of mortifying experience that most musicians would rather forget, but no matter. We were damn impressed. It was a sticky July evening at Modified Arts, and the Scottsdale quartet was in the middle of its opening set for... More >>
• BEST CONSOLATION FOR AGING PUNKS
  Jeff Dahl 50th Birthday Blast
  The urge to "live fast, die young" has been around about as long as rock 'n' roll itself, but a certain song by the Circle Jerks made it more of a punk motto 25 years ago. Funny, then, that one of that band's contemporaries, the Angry Samoans, spawned the legacy of Jeff Dahl, who's evolved into... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO SIT AND ROTATE
  The Compass Room at the Hyatt Regency Phoenix
  Like a giant roulette wheel floating 24 stories in the air, the Compass Room spins atop the downtown Hyatt, adding character to our skyline. The disc-shaped building slowly completes a full clockwise turn every 55 minutes, so guests who stay for an hour are guaranteed an unparalleled panoramic... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO WATCH SOMEONE SIT AND ROTATE
  Celebrity Theatre
  Off the beaten path of most concertgoers, this Phoenix landmark's signature revolving stage is still spinning after all these years. With no seat farther than 75 feet from the stage, Celebrity Theatre presents intimacy incomparable to other competing concert venues. Since its creation in 1963,... More >>
• BEST VENUE FOR NATIONAL ACTS
  Marquee Theatre
  There's nary a place to rest your weary feet except for a few concrete stools on the smokers' patio, and you'll probably have to find parking on the other side of the Mill Avenue Bridge, but if you want to see the bands with the biggest buzz, you'll be coming to the Marquee Theatre. Many of the... More >>
• BEST VENUE FOR LOCAL ACTS
  The Clubhouse Music Venue
  Everything else in the Valley is in a strip mall -- why not a music venue? While this place has been around for years, it only recently expanded to double its previous size, with a bigger stage, a bigger bar, and a broader lineup. Plenty of great national acts have played here, but it's clear... More >>
• BEST CLUB FOR BLUES
  Rhythm Room
  For years, Valley bluesman Hans Olson lobbied valiantly to establish an Arizona Blues Hall of Fame, building a list of 65 inductees ranging from '40s bandleader Louis Jordan (who moved here for his arthritis) to local stalwarts like Small Paul Hamilton, Big Pete Pearson, and Rochelle Raya. In... More >>
• BEST C&W NIGHTSPOT
  Graham Central Station
  Young singles who know how to make a cowboy hat and denims look bad-ass strut their stuff on the Rockin Rodeo dance floor at Graham Central Station in Tempe's auto mall district. Part of a Texas-based chain of megaclub "entertainment complexes," Graham Central Station combines four clubs and... More >>
• BEST CLUB FOR HIP-HOP
  CBNC
  50 Cent did his two-step on the bar. Britney mingled with the regular folks on the dance floor. LL Cool J sat in the exclusive "Owner's Booth" and signed autographs for fans. And such hip-hop/R&B royalty as Eve, Busta Rhymes, Missy Elliott, Beyoncé, and Alicia Keys have all gotten their... More >>
• BEST HIP-HOP NIGHT
  Blunt Club
  Wanna see giants walk the Earth? Then check out the Blunt Club on Thursday nights at Mesa's Hollywood Alley, where you'll catch live spoken word, painting and performance by legends in the Valley hip-hop scene. Like that "verbal taxidermist" and last year's New Times Best Of cover model, MC... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO SEE A HARDCORE BAND
  PHiX
  Downtown's stretch of Grand Avenue has seen a lot of changes in the past few years, most notably the number of galleries and performance spaces that keep popping up in once-dilapidated shops and warehouses. All this development is a good thing, one from which even hard rockers have benefited.... More >>
• BEST REC-ROOM APPEAL
  The Paper Heart
  This Grand Avenue staple hasn't picked sides -- it wants to be a gallery and a bar with live music. Maybe that's why the Paper Heart doesn't entirely feel like either. Instead, it reminds us of some eccentric person's living room, or maybe a crafty kid's clubhouse, with all these comfy old... More >>
• BEST MUSIC ON A SCHOOL NIGHT
  Hollywood Alley
  Without a doubt, Hollywood Alley has consistently good live music, from hardcore to Americana, on any night of the week. But the past several months have brought a lot more workweek excitement to break up the daily grind. First, Dumperfoo and Emerg McVay's Thursday night Blunt Club arrived. And... More >>
• BEST ROCK 'N' ROLL MAKEOVER
  The Rogue East
  It takes more than a fresh coat of paint and some nice new booth seating to really change a place. And sure enough, a lot of changes happened at The Rogue this past year (that is, The Rogue East, sister to Phoenix's newer Rogue West). We've heard rumors about what really went down, but all we'll... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO CATCH A FREAK SHOW
  The Trunk Space
  Stephanie Carrico and JRC's Grand Avenue art space/performance venue is sorta like Disneyland, only way smaller -- it's persistently packed with colorfully larger-than-life characters, there's tons of fun and fantasy to be had, and it could be "The Happiest Place on Earth," especially if you're... More >>
• BEST SUNDAY NIGHT CLUB THEME
  Muck Fondays at Bruno Mali's
  Sunday night is usually spent lying low, doing laundry, and licking our wounds after not snagging that honey's number at the club the night before. It's a "school night," and we gotta turn in early so we can rise bright-eyed and bushy-tailed for another week of workin' for The Man. Well, fuck... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO GET TRASHY
  Sadisco
  What do you say about a club night where one of the DJs' names is "Squalor" and people donate detritus to the garbage-laden walls? We'd say that's one trashy event, trashy-cool, actually, on the same level of John Waters' early flicks like Multiple Maniacs, Pink Flamingos, and Desperate Living.... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO HAIL SATAN
  Tranzylvania
  Hey, we know the difference between goths and Satan-worshipers. After all, the goths may look ghoulish, but we never see them at Black Mass, taking up a collection while we're doing the hard work of sacrificing a virgin. Sheesh! Still, one look at Steven Rogers' glorious new space Palazzo on a... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO GET FULL-FILLED
  Club FullFilled
  No, they don't have a buffet. But if there's a club in P-town that really should have a buffet for its patrons, Club FullFilled is the one. Club FullFilled is the Valley's premier plus-size event, held weekly at rotating locales -- usually a bar or club -- where Big Beautiful Women (BBWs) and... More >>
• BEST WAY TO GET YOUR FETISH ON
  The AZ Fetish Ball
  Fetishism used to be "underground," and the only glimpse the general public got of the fetish community at play came from movies and TV shows. But TNG (The Next Generation of Fetish & Kink in Arizona), along with local body modification outfit Horns 'n Halos, has brought several fetish events to... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO MEET A CRACK DEALER
  Margaret T. Hance Park, a.k.a. Deck Park
  Phoenix's Margaret T. Hance Park, affectionately known as Deck Park because the Interstate 10 tunnel through central Phoenix is under it, would truly be a beautiful and serene respite from downtown, except for one thing. Try walking though it on a bright Sunday afternoon, and you'll see what we... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO MEET AN ILLICIT LOVER
  The bar at Autumn Court Restaurant
  The point here is that you would never even realize that Autumn Court, one of Phoenix's venerable Chinese eateries, even has a bar, so tucked away is this cozy gin mill at the back of the place. But we made a wrong turn on the way to the restroom after an early dinner and noticed the charming... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO PICK UP DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES
  Drinkwater's City Hall Steakhouse and Bar
  Save the steak dinner for later, if at all. What Drinkwater's City Hall is known for is its gigantic, rectangular bar, and that's because there are so many horny MILFs sitting around it on Friday and Saturday nights. There are other pretenders to the throne in this town when it comes to... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO FIND A SUGAR DADDY
  Merc Bar
  If you want to find a well-heeled date for the future, or even a Rolly-wearin' husband-to-be, you don't have to confine your search to Scottsdale. All you need do is head over to Phoenix's ultra-cool Merc Bar, preferably on a Friday or Saturday night. You won't find a hipper watering hole in New... More >>
• BEST AFTER-HOURS
  .anti_space
  Although normally it may seem unwise to traipse around the seedier sections of downtown Phoenix after 2 a.m., that's usually when the after-hours parties at Scot McKenzie and Justin McBee's establishment -- located on the crack-laced fringes of the downtown warehouse district -- get going. You... More >>
• BEST WORST-KEPT SECRET, STILL
  The Black and Tan
  Okay, so last year at this time, we thought we'd pat the bad boys at the all-night party scene called the Black and Tan on the shoulders by writing them up as the "Best Worst-Kept Secret." Hey, we were just trying to tell you guys that you rock! But what followed were more denunciations and... More >>