The Bird poops on a crowd of 9/11 deniers and reports on the latest symbolic protest of Joe Arpaio

Like Larry King or the species of common cockroach, the 9/11 "troof" crowd will never completely croak.

So what if the troofers have no proof to back up their crackpot contentions? They make it up, pretend it exists when it doesn't, or just outright lie. What do they get out of strapping themselves into their straitjackets? The creepy, cult-like assurance that they are 100 percent right and the world is 100 percent wrong.

Enter Republiloon Karen Johnson, state senator from Mesa, who, to cadge a phrase from the Bird's debunking pal Pat Curley of the blog Screw Loose Change, went full woo last month with two error-riddled op-eds — one in the Arizona Republic, the other in the East Valley Tribune. This crazy old bag, who's retiring from the Arizona Senate this year to let anti-Hispanic a-hole Russell Pearce run for her seat, barfed forth more whoppers in those two pieces than a bulimic at Burger King.

In her "My Turn" column in the May 3 Republic, Johnson stated, "A Zogby poll reported that 51 percent of Americans want Congress to investigate further." Johnson was referring to a 2007 poll commissioned by the troofer site 911truth.org. What Johnson doesn't tell you is that, to the conspiratards' chagrin, the poll found that nearly 64 percent of respondents believed the official story of what happened on 9/11.

A mere 4.6 percent swallowed the bullhockey that the government "Made It Happen on Purpose"; i.e., that "certain U.S. government elements actively planned or assisted some aspects of the attacks." This theory, known as MIHOP, is the primary credo for all true-blue troofers. In the 2007 troofer poll, MIHOP lost out to "not sure," which pulled 5.4 percent.

In another example of blatant truth-twisting, Johnson observed inaccurately in her unchallenged Republic rant, "Tests corroborate the presence of thermite, an explosive used in building demolitions, at the site of the Twin Towers and [World Trade Center] Building 7."

Thermite's actually an incendiary compound, not an explosive, but, hey, who needs facts when you're jawboning about 9/11? The "tests" Johnson refers to were done by former physics professor Steven Jones, who, like her, is a complete wack-job. Jones' tests were done on dubiously collected dust samples, making the results irrelevant to all but his fellow troofers.

The bogus theory that thermite was used to bring down the Twin Towers and the nearby World Trade Center 7, which also collapsed on 9/11, is made mincemeat of by the National Institutes of Standards and Technology, the federal agency that issued a massive report on the collapse of WTC Buildings One and Two. "Many thousands of pounds of thermite would need to have been placed inconspicuously ahead of time, remotely ignited, and somehow held in direct contact with the surface of hundreds of massive structural components" to weaken one of the buildings, NIST points out,

"This makes [thermite] an unlikely substance for achieving a controlled demolition," NIST concludes.

There's never been any evidence of thermite or collapse-inducing explosives at WTC ground zero. Nor has anybody ever located any of the ignition devices that would've been necessary to set off the thermite. Johnson and her fellow kooks have nothing but their own tired, twisted fantasies to prop up these lunatic arguments.

Another sick delusion involves the collapse of WTC 7, a lodestone for 9/11 nutbars. In Johnson's Republic piece, she stated, "The building collapsed suddenly, straight down, at nearly freefall speed."

There was nothing sudden about the collapse of WTC 7. The building had been burning nonstop all day long and had been severely damaged that a.m. by tons of falling debris from the North Tower. By the end of the day, the Fire Department of New York was keeping people away from the building because they knew it was going to collapse.

Does Johnson actually believe that the firemen, the heroes of 9/11, were in on the conspiracy to flatten WTC 7? If so, The Bird would like to hang a placard announcing that contention around Karen's neck and run her through the streets of Manhattan to see how long it would take before she's tarred and feathered.

WTC 7 didn't come down at "nearly freefall speed." Troofers say it took about 6.6 seconds. But they begin their count 10 seconds too late. Actual collapse time: closer to 16 seconds. Don't believe this bilious blue jay? Check out the online documentaries of Truth Be Told Productions on YouTube.