Metrocenter: Part One of "Look What They’ve Done to My Mall, Ma!"

Not so. It's obvious that MetroCenter has had a face lift or two. Pretty much the only recognizable landmark is the big, ugly Sears store, which is no surprise, since the mall was built by Homart Development Company, the real estate division of Sears, Roebuck and Company. The original Rhodes store (from which I once purchased a pretty great pair of denim elephant bells, and which eventually became a Liberty House, then a Joske's, then a Dillard's, and finally a JCPenney) is vacant now. All those gorgeous fountains have been ripped out, replaced by kid-friendly rest areas, and the swoopy entrance structures have been replaced (sorry, Frank) by simple flat mosaics with glass doors. But it just isn't true that MetroCenter has gone ghetto. It looks different, sure, but time marches on. I thought it looked pretty nice. Different, but nice.

What he's saying is I missed Metrocenter's ghetto era. That's okay. It was nice to see it again, like running into an old high school pal who looks different but is just as friendly as she was 30 years ago. On my way out, I stopped by the restaurant where I used to work, now long gone and replaced by one of those over-decorated faux-French cafes that serves Mexican and American and Italian cuisine, but almost no French food. I stood in the spot that used to be my boss's office and which is now a salad bar, and I thought, "I should feel horny. Or old. Or sad that the spot where I once went for sex is now a place where people go for Ranch dressing and croutons." But all I felt was hungry. So I sat down and ordered some flautas.