Burn, Baby, Burn!

By her own account, her childhood sounds as though it was staid, conservative, bourgeois. Her father was in the military; she won't say which branch. Her mom was an English teacher who passed away at the age of 91 two Christmases ago.

"My mother spent her whole life searching for security," says Lawless. "I've spent my life taking risks. We're different people in that respect."

She lived in Daly City, California, for 22 years until 2000, when she decided to hit the road. Her income before that came from a variety of jobs. She worked for the phone company, as a cab driver, a termite inspector, a clerk. Post-2000, she roamed the Western states until she gravitated to Arizona, drawn by the illegal-chasin' thrills to be had in Cochise County. How she's afforded her vagabond lifestyle — parking the RV trailer in Tucson, then Colorado, then Phoenix, and in Hereford since the beginning of the month — is a mystery. Rich she ain't, and she constantly complains about looking for a job. Maybe she has a nest egg somewhere. Who knows? She pleads poverty when you query her about it.

Lawless' "conversion" to anti-illegal-immigrationism came through the intervention of a pal named Terry, whom she met at a gun show. (Her interest in firearms has spanned 30 years, she says.)

"He worked on me for a couple of years," explains Lawless. "Until I realized that the media wasn't giving me the real story."

She'd read about what was happening in Cochise County, and the adventure of it all appealed to her, inflaming her inner warrior that for so long had been yearning to breathe free under the civilizing influence of San Francisco's urbanity. In Cochise, she'd be able to camp out, shoot her pistols with impunity, go on "patrols" for "invaders," rough it with the guys. She could finally become what her surname had always implied, "Lawless."

In her mind, she'd be just as tough and courageous as her favorite TV character, Xena, her devotion to whom, she grudgingly admits, may have a little something to do with why she chose the same last name as the actress who played the "warrior princess," Lucy Lawless.

An online report from the 1997 Northern California Hercules & Xena Fest sums up Lawless' situation at that time:

"Laine Lawless is a 47-year-old single lesbian living in San Francisco who loves to write alt fan fiction, and is currently writing a screenplay set in ancient times featuring strong female protagonists. An avowed Hardcore Nutball Xenite, Ms. Lawless cannot make up her mind whether she wants to be Xena or marry her."

Next to the description is a photo of a younger, softer Lawless with a wide grin, dressed in a Smokey the Bear hat and wielding a bullwhip. The screenplay mentioned here was Amazons and Slaves. But Lawless now concedes it's probably too "lesbian" to get produced. Currently, she's laboring on a prison-break sci-fi manuscript she's calling Crosscut.

Nevertheless, it's her Xena fan fiction that offers the most insight into Lawless' persona. In a series of seven short stories with titles such as "Dark Heart" and "Xena and the Moon Goddess," Lawless follows the travels of the muscular Xena as she kicks male butt and engages in torrid, explicit sex with her femme lover Gabrielle. For what they are, the stories are not badly written.

"The whole program Xena: Warrior Princess was like a dream come true for us lesbians," enthuses Lawless. "Here you have this warrior woman who can beat up men — who can beat up anyone, actually, who rides a really great horse. She's a hot babe. She has many skills. She's a psychic. She has kind of a tortured past, but that just makes her a little bit more interesting. And here she is with her sidekick, who just happens to be a woman. I mean, are you kidding me? This is like every lesbian's fantasy."

Truly, the show enjoyed a devoted lesbian following during its six seasons, from 1995 to 2001. Xena's orientation was mostly implied in the series, however. And her affection for Gabrielle was never as R- or X-rated as it is in Lawless' raunchy tales, which you can still find posted on AUSXIP.com, "The Australian Xena Information Page."

Reading Lawless' lit, the parallels between herself and Xena go beyond any appropriation of Lucy Lawless' last name.

Like Xena, Lawless is a pagan who worships Artemis (Diana), goddess of the hunt. Lawless is fond of the raven as a symbol, and sees ravens as a good omen, as does Xena. Like Xena, Lawless is not afraid to confront men, and sees herself as a fearsome warrior. Xena and Lawless are mistresses of many weapons, such as the whip. Guns had not been invented in Xena's time, of course, but Lawless has a concealed-weapons permit for her Browning Hi-Power and her Mauser HSc.

"I feel like I've been a warrior all my life," she affirms. "I've always been fighting for something or another, and I've stood up for certain things when other people wouldn't."

Still, the road she's chosen has been long, weary, and lonely. Lawless remains Gabrielle-less. Her incendiary, often repulsive opinions regarding Mexican immigrants do not exactly endear her to the average lesbian her age who's wanting to spoon. How long she'll commit herself to mocking the national symbols of America's neighbor to the south remains an open question. Currently, she's hanging out in Hereford after her stint in Phoenix. Next stop: the Big Easy for Mardi Gras. While in Louisiana, she'll collaborate with a writing partner on the rest of Crosscut, she says. But you can expect her to be back. The battle's in her blood. And southern Arizona is where the action's at for those obsessed with border issues.